exnihilo: (identity)
Mira Hidalgo ([personal profile] exnihilo) wrote2014-01-09 02:43 pm

4 - standing by, locked message + spam

[Filtered away from all the residents of the barge, but open to any random fourth-wall people who might bother her.]

If you have any instructions for me, I'm here.

[Later, spam]

[She's just. Walking, when it hits her, descending the stairs to her room after another substitute kitchen shift. She wants to scream and bleed and set things on fire, and she barely understands why. She just - she did what she was supposed to do, she did, she didn't hide, and they - we love you, Mira, no one else will ever - they didn't -

She sits down in the middle of the stairwell, back to the wall, and draws her knees up tight so she can hide her face against them.]
kissthatgoodbye: (Calculating)

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[personal profile] kissthatgoodbye 2014-01-09 10:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[Alec actually hesitates when he receives this one, for a moment. Then he makes his end of the connection as secure as he possibly can - it was secure already, but he locks out the other transgenics, even - and sits forward slightly.

He's far more serious than most people would give him credit for, right now. And far more careful.

At ease. What's your designation?
kissthatgoodbye: (Barcode)

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[personal profile] kissthatgoodbye 2014-01-10 12:40 am (UTC)(link)
[He's satisfied by the change, not the least because it confirms his suspicions. She isn't Manticore, or if she is, not from the general purposes courses. PsyOps had a similar construct but not identical discipline - their abilities gained them sufferance.

But even if she's not Manticore at all, at least on the surface it's close enough. She's waiting on orders. They make her feel safer.

My designation is X5-494. My name is Alec. I'm transgenic, an officer from Manticore. Does any of this mean anything to you?
kissthatgoodbye: (True Blue)

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[personal profile] kissthatgoodbye 2014-01-10 01:30 am (UTC)(link)
Don't be sorry.

[This slightly dry-toned; no one should ever be sorry for not recognizing Manticore's name. He will bury them however he can, as long as he can do so without danger to himself.

The instability in her, though, is achingly familiar. Something he was terrified of, even if he never admitted it. The reliance on Manticore, the kind of definition of one's self using them as a base that had resulted in his twin collapsing in on himself. He's afraid of it, he despises it in the X5 that caused him to reap the consequences, but he could never say he didn't understand it.

Is it? Then you're ahead of the curve. Who are you waiting on instructions from, Mira Hidalgo?
kissthatgoodbye: (Never Look Back)

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[personal profile] kissthatgoodbye 2014-01-10 08:51 am (UTC)(link)

[He can read that loud and clear, and he pauses to consider his next question carefully. Fear is dangerous. It makes people unpredictable, it hollows them out from the inside until they fold under the slightest pressure, it makes them someone other than who they are, if they ever knew in the first place.

The worst part about it is when the fear is well earned. So he chooses his words deliberately:

Can you be helped? [Does she want it? Would it make things worse?]
kissthatgoodbye: (How About Not)

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[personal profile] kissthatgoodbye 2014-01-17 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
[It's a little unnerving, because Alec can pretend all he likes, but he's seen all manner of reactions to reaching adulthood in an environment like the one Manticore set up: hyper-intelligent, hyper-competent sentient beings, under pressure to perform and without the freedom to express themselves as individuals, to speak up for the things they want or believe. Forbidden even to name themselves.

He's one of the fortunate ones, and he knows he's fucked up beyond repair. Others...

Can you be helped?
kissthatgoodbye: (Rachel)

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[personal profile] kissthatgoodbye 2014-01-24 05:37 am (UTC)(link)
[It's the differences beyond, in spite of, through the similarities that are throwing Alec. And her account, however sparse, and her tone, however careful, strikes a chord in him that vibrates where there is no room for movement of any kind. Not without pain. He straps it all down tight again, shaking his head as if to clear it, and does what he always does: pushes forward more determined than ever.

He does not think about a girl he loved, a girl who died because he loved her. Because he tried to go, once, and it was a mistake, and he has spent the rest of his life paying for it - and for hers.

Is there someone you can trust, there?
Edited (I guess Alec wasn't done, oops) 2014-01-24 05:39 (UTC)
kissthatgoodbye: (I Require Your Absence)

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[personal profile] kissthatgoodbye 2014-02-05 07:17 am (UTC)(link)
[Alec trusts no one. He has learned to fake it, and has even begun to see why he would want to, but actual trust?

No. Which is why he sighs, then shakes his head.

You didn't ask for my advice, but what can I say? I just start talking and it all comes out.

Tell them. [Whatever it is, tell them.] But don't say it. Tell them until they hear it.

If they can be trusted, they will. Eventually.
kissthatgoodbye: (True Blue)

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[personal profile] kissthatgoodbye 2014-02-16 03:26 am (UTC)(link)
[He can't tell her how, or he would; it varies from case to case. Similar enough perhaps, but not enough that what worked for him with Max, with Manticore, will work for her and this Barge he's come to know so much about by complete accident.

His voice and his eyes, both steady, are uncharacteristically earnest when he says the only other thing he knows to say.

Good luck.
chaoticreckless: (grin)

[personal profile] chaoticreckless 2014-01-10 06:09 am (UTC)(link)

To the left. Take it back now, y'all. Cha cha real smooth.
chaoticreckless: (grin)

[personal profile] chaoticreckless 2014-01-14 12:13 pm (UTC)(link)
I know, right?
reasonability: (09)

[personal profile] reasonability 2014-01-11 02:03 am (UTC)(link)
I don't have any instructions. But if I did, the first would be to tell me your name.
reasonability: (Default)

[personal profile] reasonability 2014-01-14 03:07 am (UTC)(link)

[ Not Agent Coulson. Though he can become Agent Coulson, if it looks like she needs it. ]

I'm guessing you weren't looking for me.